Archive for category Float Trips
Floaters Gone Wild!
Posted by Will Hanke in Float Trips on May 20th, 2013
Every Saturday from Memorial Day to Labor Day, thousands flock to Missouri Rivers in a mid-western version of the “Gone Wild” series. In the Show-Me state, it’s “Floaters Gone Wild” – where elements of spring break and Mardi Gras coalesce into something that’s definitely not your family float trip.
Saturday floats are rated PG-13 to R depending on the group and whether it’s the beginning or end of a float. Alcohol and innuendo are key components of the Saturday phenomenon. Although no glass is allowed on the river, mixed drinks and shots with sexy names such as “French Kiss”, “Slippery Nipple”, “Sex on the Beach”, or “Screaming Orgasm” figure prominently. Read the rest of this entry »
Relationship Compatibility: The Float Trip Test
Posted by Will Hanke in Float Trips on May 9th, 2013
I have made a point of going on at least one float trip every year since 1978. After more than thirty-four years, I feel that I have achieved a certain expertise—not in the way I paddle, but in my observations of couples on the river. Read the rest of this entry »
Saving Money on Your Next Float Trip
Posted by Will Hanke in Float Trips on April 22nd, 2013
There’s nothing like spending time with your family and friends floating down one of Missouri’s picturesque rivers, camping in the great outdoors and sleeping under the stars. Though one of the most affordable ways for families to take a vacation, float trips seem to get more expensive each year. With prices at the pump soaring, increasing fees for camping permits and rising costs for boats and camping gear, many families are looking for ways to save as much money as possible so they can take more trips next year. Here are some money saving tips for your next float trip: Read the rest of this entry »
Review: Fresh Fog 80042 Electric Outdoor Cooling Misting System Kit
Posted by Will Hanke in Float Trips on April 18th, 2013
A Missouri summer isn’t complete without a float trip down one of the state’s many floatable rivers. Unfortunately, Missouri’s summer heat can be brutal. By the end of July the sun has heated much of the rivers’ water to temperatures that mimic bath water which is why having a Fresh Fog 80042 Electric Outdoor Cooling Misting System Kit on hand can make even the hottest of float trips much more bearable. When air conditioning isn’t available, a cooling misting system is a camper’s best defense when it comes to keeping cool and preventing heat stroke. Read the rest of this entry »
Staying Warm in Your Tent
Posted by Will Hanke in Float Trips on April 8th, 2013
If you’re one of the diehards who enjoy taking a float trip in early spring and late fall, you know what a challenge it is to stay warm in a tent. While there’s nothing like the smell of a campfire and waking up to a silence that is only experienced when the crowds have all gone, nights can be dog gone frigid. The following tips can help to keep you stay warmer on those chilly nights. Read the rest of this entry »
Misinformation & Unanswered Questions About Floating
Posted by Will Hanke in Float Trips on April 3rd, 2013
On April 1, 2013, we published an article titled New Alcohol Law Targets Floaters which basically said the Missouri Department of Rivers & Streams (which I made up) had passed a law banning mixed drinks from the rivers. This article was simply an April Fools prank (and most were smart enough to get that) – yet it riled the feathers of many – from the ‘river purists’ to the party floaters. Nonetheless, it was simply an April Fools joke and nothing more. Read the rest of this entry »
An Open Letter to Pat Sutcliffe at MissouriCanoe.org
Posted by Will Hanke in Canoes, Float Trips on April 2nd, 2013
Name: Pat Sutcliffe
Email: pat@canoemissouri.com
Customer Comments:
As an advertiser on Float Missouri I was wondering if you might consider asking the people who maintain the site to put a retraction on the “real funny joke” they posted yesterday? It is causing tremendous problems.
It didn’t end up being very funny for the canoeing industry in Missouri.
Thanks!
Pat Sutcliffe
This letter was sent to one of our advertisers after our New Alcohol Law Targets Floaters April Fools post gained, let’s just say, a little attention. Below is my response to Mr./Mrs. Sutcliffe. Read the rest of this entry »
New Alcohol Law Targets Floaters
Posted by Will Hanke in Float Trips on April 1st, 2013
NOTE: The following article was an April Fools joke and is NOT real.
In a surprising announcement this morning, the Missouri Department of Rivers & Streams has announced a new initiative to keep mixed drinks off rivers throughout the state. The move, announced this morning at a press conference in Jefferson City, is aimed particularly at female floaters who consume most of the mixed drinks.
Senior Aide to the Department President Tom Collins announced the new initiative just before the summer floating season gets underway. Read the rest of this entry »
Coleman Red Canyon 17-Foot by 10-Foot 8-Person Modified Dome Tent
Posted by Will Hanke in Float Trips on March 31st, 2013
After a long day of floating on the river, tired families want to set up their tent and campsite as quickly as possible. That’s why the Coleman Red Canyon 17-Foot by 10-Foot 8-Person Modified Dome Tent is ideal for Missouri summer float trips. Affordable and easy to pitch, no family should be without the Coleman Red Canyon Modified Dome Tent on their next summer float trip. Read the rest of this entry »
Tips for Cliff Diving on Your Next Missouri Float Trip
Posted by Will Hanke in Float Trips, Safety on March 18th, 2013
For adventure seeking souls on float trips, there’s nothing like the adrenaline rush from cliff diving. Yet every summer injuries and deaths are reported because of it. Whether your friends dare you to do it or you took the initiative yourself, it’s always important to remember that jumping off a cliff is dangerous. Cliff diving should only be done under expert supervision when you’re a beginner. In fact, it should never be done alone, no matter how experienced you think you are. Here are some tips for cliff diving. Read the rest of this entry »





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